Suggested Grade/Age Range: Grades 4-6 (ages 9-11)

Activity Objective: The goal of this activity is to give children an opportunity to practice assertive “no” messages in difficult peer situations.

Learning Goals
Big Messages to Kids

Link to Ontario Curriculum

Materials Required:

• Scenarios cards
• Chart paper and markers
• Pencils and erasers

Prep Time: 10-15 minutes

• Make copies of scenarios cards
• Cut out scenario cards
• Prepare all writing utensils

Task Time: 40 minutes

• Introduce Activity
• Small Group Skit Planning
• Skit Presentations and Discussion

Activity Description:

Opening Discussion:

1.       Ask the class for their ideas on important verbal and non-verbal cues to give when saying no assertively. Write these down on chart paper for them to refer to when they are practicing for their skits. For example, some details to pay attention to can include:

• Verbal cues: saying “no” firmly and clearly, not apologizing for saying “no”, be direct, repeat the “no” statement as needed
• Non-verbal cues: reinforce “no” by shaking the head, keep shoulders back, head up, and back straight, make direct eye contact

Activity:

2.       Tell the class that they will be working in groups of 3 to come up with short skits for scenarios where they will practice assertively saying no

3.       Divide individuals into their groups of 3 and give them about 15 minutes to work on a short skit in their groups. Have blank pieces of paper available for the groups to write down their lines on. Circulate amongst the groups and provide feedback as needed

Wrap-up Discussion/Presentations:

4.       Have each group present their skits in front of the whole class. Write down the ways different groups chose to say no assertively

5.       Have a whole class discussion. Use the following as guiding questions:

• How did it feel to answer assertively?
• How did it feel to hear an assertive response?
• What are some other situations where it is okay to say “no”? (emphasize that it is always okay to say “no” to situations that makes one feel uncomfortable)

6.       Emphasize that we have the right to firmly say no and that we can do so when we are standing up for our own rights and also respecting others

Activity Extensions:

Have children write an entry in their journals or Writer’s Notebooks on what they have learned from this activity and how they feel about assertively saying no in peer social situations

Additional Comments:

It is imperative to address the fact that in dangerous situations, such as that of abuse, it is not always possible to say no and that option may not be available. Emphasize that children should not feel guilty/ashamed for not being able to say no in those situations.  It is critical that children know to ask for help from an adult they trust 

Additional Resources:

You may also choose to review the Communication Literature Review before implementing this activity. It can be found here.